After a series of
really terrible decisions last week, including Axel deciding to go wandering
around a vampire infested city with three complete rookies, Axel and his extras
get captured. As a designated Sexy Love Interest he is stripped to the waist
and tied up
And far be it from me
to criticise good eye candy but this is bizarre. If you’re going to kidnap
someone and strip them off their clothes (either to make them vulnerable or
because you’re horny) you strip them of their clothes. I can’t think of a
situation where you would strip only one of your captives to the waist only.
Oh another soldier
survived to be tied up with more clothes - but only so the B’ah can eat him and
Axel can have his NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Moment. Well done Axel, those soldiers
were probably better off hiding without you.
The B’ah ghosts
around being kind of anticlimatic and planning to turn him - but it doesn’t
work because his blood is super nasty now. So she’s going to squish his head
instead - I think this is mind reading. But apparently not killing him
The B’ah delivers his
dog tags to Dre one of the survivors who gives them to Vanessa. She announces
she’s going to go rampaging. He suggests she doesn’t.
Vanessa: RAWR! |
So rampaging it is.
She does pause to
lick Axel’s dogtags so she can taste his blood and get all red eyed - and
possibly track Axel, possibly. Barry is freaked out watching this from behind.
I’m not sure what is so scary about the back of Vanessa’s head because there’s
absolutely no way he could see her lick the blood from that angle. He decides
to follow her because people have dubious decision making skills on TV Landia.
I mean, in a world that has been completely overrun by vampires he decides to
follow the strange combat monster who licks up blood all on his own. Why would
you do this? She then reveals that yes, she totally drinks blood so he just
cuts himself and offers her the wound.
So he runs off and
Vanessa gets to confront the B’ah and her Jiang Shi. They have a brief speech
about how Vanessa is unworthy to have a totem and how she’s going to take it
and raise the Dark Lord before we have a fight scene
And it’s not a bad
fight scene, random Jiang Shi get smooshed and there’s some decently shiny
martial arts choreography but for all everyone is going OOOH THE B’AH IS SUPER
SCARY it’s kind of anti-climatic. She kind of moves around quickly and
sometimes ghosts in and out. I think they could have made more of this, like
Vanessa can’t touch her because she keeps vanishing which would have made the
ending where she is stopped because Axel surprise stabs her in the back
stopping her zooming away and letting them kill her.
Still the B’ah is
defeated and they take blood back to Scarlett so she is healed and everything
is wonderful. The remaining survivors think they can now survive in the remains
of San Francisco which is kind of optimistic because this world is still
technically full of vampires, remember
Hey, does anyone
remember this? Because there doesn’t seem to be any vampires around any more?
Anyway they do seem
to remember there are a lot of vampires left so maybe the gang should go to
Denver. But they protest they can’t go alone (despite being willing to stay in
San Francisco alone) but Axel volunteers to go with them. Axel, hon, I don’t
want to burst your bubble but I think they wanted the two super powered women.
You couldn’t keep a unit of soldiers alive
This means we have
goodbyes and Scarlett and Vanessa going off alone and Vanessa revealing her
grand plan
She’s not going to
destroy the totems. She’s going to use them. To resurrect the Dark One.
This… does not seem
like a good idea Vanessa…
Vanessa: RAWR! |
Oookay we’re doing this.
Let’s go to Denver to
see if people there are as stupid than Vanessa and co
Yes, yes they are.
So, while coming home
from a drunken night out, Jolene and Sarah are attacked by a vampire but they
find out that the vampire repellent stuff they’re injected with… works? I mean
they say it works? I see Jolene pinned to the floor with a vampire trying to bite
her in the face but they say it’s work so I assume that’s why she wasn’t
bitten?
But as the episode
goes on we see Jolene attacked by jealous creepy dude Jared who she works with
and we see Jolene also snarling and snapping at Sarah for no apparent reason
and even she realises her behaviour is unreasonable. Time for Sarah to do some
experiments - and she realises the anti-vampire serum also causes violent ragy
impulses
Ok, can I just check
what Sarah is doing in Denver? Because they’ve kind of given her a lab and left
her to her own devices to do whatever whim she has? This seems… odd? They don’t
have stuff for a doctor to do?
Anyway they report to
the authorities that the serum is evil and they decide that psychotic rage
incidents are a totally ok side effect so long as it makes people feel safe.
Are vampire attacks
in Denver that regular that it’s worth having any member of your populace
lashing out in violent rage if they’re a little resistant? This does not seem
like reasonable decision making
Sarah informs them
that there’s also daywalking super vampires that may be immune. But the powers
that be just kind of shrug that off and decide it’s a wild story. Um… why? Why
wouldn’t you believe the doctor who has very recently being out in the vampire
infested wilderness? Why would you think that the isolated, secure people in
Denver would know better?
Why does everyone
make such bad decisions? WHYYYYYY?
Meanwhile Phillip is
acting out more and more dramatically as he fails to deal with all his vampire
guilt while Julius runs around trying to cover for him and enabling him because
of his own vampire guilt. After shooting himself in the head fails because of
the whole immortality thing, Phillip jumps off a building. Whether or not he
gets up remains to be seen
I hate the Idiot
Ball
I hate storylines
which are driven entirely by character incompetence.