Wynonna and Charlie
are still doing their casual stress release thing in a fire engine (which is
just awkward) while Nicole campaigns for support to become the new sheriff.
Nedry is all very
very supportive of this, happy to retire and snark (Jeremy’s also there and
Waverley makes a quip about whether he lives there and this is just Wynonna
Earp kind of lampshading that they’ve done so little with Jeremy he
doesn’t even have a home) as he sets Nicole and Wynonna together clearing out
his weird cupboard of weirdness. Any potential magical artefacts which he’d
have trouble explaining he’s stuffed in the cupboard
Wynonna quickly
derides this as make work to try and make them work together because Wynonna
and Nicole don’t always get on. This has always been kind of bubbling but this
episode lays it out: Nicole likes order and rules. Especially since she’s the
sheriff which kind of needs some level of rules and orders and planning. While
Wynonna likes to wing it, burn it all down and kind of get through it. They
clash a lot and eventually their squabbling breaks some of the artefacts
We know that’s a bad
idea.
Nedry also tells
Nicole that she needs to get the approval of Bunny Loblaw, who controls the
city council. And she is a terrible terrible person.
She visits Nicole, is
clearly homophobic (and points to the show for knowing that homophobes are
often smart enough not to yell slurs but do like their dog whistles: like
praising Wynonna for being a “straight shooter”) and equally clearly doesn’t
like that Nicole isn’t from Purgatory. She’s also allergic to cats and even
thinking of backing Wynonna for Sheriff. She makes one valid complaint - she
didn’t like that Nedry lied to her about the supernatural shenanigans in the
city and kept her in the dark. She wants to be told
While Wynonna and Nicole bicker away (Wynonna doesn’t actually want to be sheriff but she takes issue with Nicole so passionately insisting how utterly terrible Wynonna would be as a sheriff. I mean, it’s not wrong but it is mean), Bunny sees a gnome and meets Nicole’s cat, Calamity Jane (this is an AWESOME name for a cat and I want to get a cat just so I can call her this!) which is unfortunate as she has a pet allergy and promptly passes out
There follows one of
the most hilarious exchanges there has ever been on this show. And this is Wynonna
Earp which has some of the biplays ever in the genre. This show is the
master of snark and this set a new level
From “Balls, Bunny’s
dead”. To Wynonna insisting she knows a dozen places to hide a body, “she’s
alive” “fine, I’ll save them for another time.” Nicole insists Wynonna get
Bunny’s purse, so which Wynonna relies “yes, cash!” Not medication.
Bunny is actually
alive. And doesn’t want to go to hospital because it has too many immigrant
doctors - because she is a terrible terrible person.
While they’re dealing
with that, some passing frat boys steal the police car and drive off with it -
with Bunny inside.
Which means stealing
Bunny’s car to follow her, while using Jeremy to track the car (he finds the
whole thing hilarious) to a biker bar. There Nicole tries to use her spare key
to let Bunny out of the car - and her key breaks in the lock.
Wynonna wants to
shoot out the windows. Nicole thinks she could hit Bunny. Wynonna would take
this risk
Which means they have
to go into a biker bar full of Revenants and bargain for the keys off the frat
guys - which involves a drinking competition (and I kind of like how the
Revenants are totally sticking to the rules of this) except Nicole gets blasted
and Wynonna doesn’t - because she’s cheating.
So we now have them
running through the snowy woods evading two separate bands of Revenants - and
Peacemaker jams. Until they run across a giant Mountain man who demands a new
wife…
“Not it”
Yeah that sums up
everything
Back at the police
station, Jeremy and Waverley realise this string of bad luck is a bit extreme
and check out what they broke when clearing our Nedry’s magic cupboard. They
find a broken mirror and obviously suspect the 7 years bad luck and try to fix
it as Wynonna and Nicole arrive, chased by the Mountain Man looking for his
wife
So along with the
broken mirror they also broke a garden gnome - a female garden gnome. Yes it’s
a giant gnome., It’s Wynonna Earp, just run with it. And when they fix
the female gnome, he leaves, appeased
And Wynonna then
confronts Bunny - she doesn’t want Nicole as sheriff. Is it homophobia or
xenophobia? She responds that she doesn’t have to choose
So Wynonna threatens
to unleash the monsters on Bunny. She wanted to know the truth about Purgatory
- well she saw a sliver today and then fainted. Does she want to see the whole
lot? No, no she does not.
Wynonna and Nicole
are definitely in a better place now having found a level. And Nedry and Nicole
have a wonderful moment after Wynonna reveals Nedry was the one who rescued her
when she survived a massacre and he worked to try and get her to come to
Purgatory - and he calls her a daughter and it’s full of all the AWWWWWW
What is not good is Doc
He wakes half-naked
with Kate and is now a vampire - losing his reflection and Bulshar’s ring
rejecting him. He quickly tries to do a take back on the whole thing, insisting
he hasn’t chosen Kate, he isn’t loyal to her, he loves Wynonna etc etc. It all
seems very hollow with the actual fangs and Kate is clear he has ALREADY
chosen.
He has a wonderful
exalting description of Wynonna - she makes him a better man, she makes him
want to help people, be more. While Kate embraces Doc for who he is - a selfish
rogue with no interest in helping others. The former sentiment sounds uplifting
but I really don’t like how this contrasts and compares Kate and Wynonna: Kate
is the corrupter, the hedonist, the one who keeps trophies of the people she’s
killed, while Wynonna lifts Doc up. It’s a shame because the last thing this
show has done is put Wynonna on a pedestal - and it would be far stronger to
have Kate and Wynonna grow to like each other… this isn’t going to end well. I
hold a tiny hope that it will lead to Kate seeing what Doc does and what
Wynonna is - a rogue, who still does good.
He leaves Kate and we
have another flawed and broken character trying to do good: Michelle. She drags
Doc to Willa’s grave so she can say goodbye to her oldest daughter - and it’s
clear that Michelle both loved her but also knew exactly who Willa was… and she
wasn’t. She wasn’t a nice person and she did terrible things and was far more
Ward’s daughter than her’s.
Michelle also has a
really self-appropriating harsh take on her mental illness - using it quite
skillfully to poke Doc every time he implies she’s “crazy” or out of her kind
She tells Doc she’s
let Bobo go and knows what happened to Julian - Ward Earp forced him out of the
Ghost River Triangle and he’s now all lost - and Michelle intends to leave and
go get him
Doc is furious -
she’s abandoning her family again, she has released one of their greatest
enemies all to pursue a love interest. She’s put them all at risk. Michelle is
not having any shaming from a vampire - and leaves.
She does leave
letters behind for Waverley and Wynonna. Which has Waverley in tears and when
Wynonna is all raw from comforting her she has her own message saying not to
trust Doc. She confronts him, there’s emotion, there’s tears, there’s slapping…
and Doc is exposed as a vampire. She heartbreakingly says he let Kate do this -
throwing away her and Alice, their daughter.
And she uses his vampireness to banish him from the property
Oh Doc - again this
won’t end well. Love triangles! Why do we have to have the love triangles?
Whyyyy? Why can’t all the good guys get along? Whyyyy? I fear this ends with
Kate being staked. Less love triangles - more Wynonna and Nicole snarking! Less tears, more wisecracking!
