We have an ominous vampire walking the street… in
daylight.
Ephraim catches up with his contact in DC who is
apparently an old friend who seems quite blasé about the whole hidden identity
thing. We quickly learn that outside of New York news is being very carefully
controlled and they don’t realise how terribad it is.
Ephraim tells him the plan to unleash his anti-vampire bioweapon and what he needs his friend Rob to help spread it around. Rob points out it’s not that easy to get the DoD to unleash a bio-weapon over New York City. Funny how that works. Instead they’re going to go with Rob’s contacts
News reports that the president is being impeached for
responding so poorly to the disaster and congress and senate have pretty much
devolved into childish brawling. So it’s business as usual. Rob’s contact, Leigh
arrives and Ephraim shows her his method of taking down the vampires which
looks hella awesome. It also reveals just how bad the vampire menace has become
with over 3,000,000 infected.
We get some long winded war stories before Leigh finally
sets up a meeting. And we get some flirting, kissing and going home to have sex
between Leigh and Ephraim. Because we really need this right now. Really.
Anyway the next morning Ephraim is outraged to realise the people Leigh is
meeting will only actually deploy the cure if they get a whole lot of exclusive
proprietary rights because Business.
Ephraim gets his meeting with a big boss man, General
Dean Rushing, who wants Stoneheart to help. That would be Palmer’s company and
a very bad idea. They manage to get him on side. Leigh also gets her side of the
deal all set up and it’s all looking good.
They return to Rob’s house to find Rob dead – and an
assassin waiting. He kills Leigh but not Ephraim (damn it) who shoots him. The
assassin has Stoneheart’s corporate logo on his phone
Let me repeat that – the assassin has his employer’s logo
on his phone. The assassin is carrying a brand name. The assassin is carrying proof
of employment. The. Assassin. Is. Carrying. Identification. Of. His. Employer.
Really?
Back in the city, Fitzwilliam joins the merry band (and
Zach, who needs to be eaten). Nora also has the unenviable task of reassuring
Zach while his dad is away. Fitzwilliam tells them about the properties Palmer
has been buying while Vasiliy is all suspicious and untrusting. Fitzwilliam
also spills on Palmer’s motivation – wanting immortality since he has always
been plagued by ill health (I kind of thought everyone already knew this).
Nora checks in with Justine Ferraldo while taking Zach
out for clothes where they briefly nod at strategy and Zach’s lack of family.
Oh look another completely damn pointless scene. No, I take it back, this scene
exists entirely so Nora and Zach can get a lift home IN THE DARK so they can be
attacked by Kelly’s spider-vampires
They shelter in a church where they manage to call
Abraham for help (good thing those phones are up and running). They manage to
set a rather nifty trap while they play hide and seek in the church,
unfortunately Zach’s asthma has him coughing loudly – it would be an ultra
tense scene if it weren’t for the fact we KNOW Zach won’t die
And, yes, Abe and co come to the rescue, and Fitzwilliam gets bitten. Of course he does. Well that was predictable. He has a respectful goodbye scene with Abraham before he is beheaded.
Palmer and Eichorst talk master races (vampires), Palmer’s
security system (which Eichorst is a little annoyed by because Palmer didn’t
tell him about the lethal UV defences) and the ominous yet vaguely undefined plan
that is about to be unleashed. Eichorst continues not to tell Palmer that the
Master is injured and Palmer continues to be super arrogant with little regard
for his own safety
Eichorst goes to see the Master with Bolivar; the Master
arises from his grave dirt and Eichorst expects to be the Master’s new vessel
(since his current one is dying/badly injured/not happy). And he’s kind of put out
when the Master chooses Bolivar instead. It’s just as disgusting as last time
I would have thought not being completely replaced by the
Master would be a good thing. The Master in his new body still calls Eichorst
special – and how they’ll always be together.
Gus is still trying to make friends with Angel due to his
love of the old Silver Angel movies. Because when vampires are taking over, you
really take time out for film trivia. After much heckling, Angel angrily admits
it though clearly doesn’t want to talk about it. Since he’s giving out very
strong “I don’t want to talk about this” signals, Aanya decides to take Gus to
the basement where Angel watches his movies
What is wrong with you people?! The city is being
consumed by vampires and you’re harassing an old wrestler who just wants to be
left alone? Who does this? Why would Aanya do this?!
Her dad insists that business in the restaurant continue
as normal – including her making deliveries. Angel and Gus both step up to
offer to go with her since it’s not safe and there’s a bit of testosterone duelling
(Angel does not like Gus the “horny gang banger”) until Gus says they should
let Aanya decide (what a nice and rare gesture). She chooses both of them
because she’s not a fool.
They make the delivery, discussing her hopes, Gus’s past
and killing a couple of vampires.
Back to the daylight walking vampire who goes to see the Ancients
to express how much he hates New York and even telling the Ancients off for
being too nice to the Master. Well, he doesn’t mince words. Vorn, the leader of
the vampire death squad working with Gus that got incincerated, was apparently
trained by this guy (which makes this guy Quinlan which is what I was calling Vorn.
Oops). Quinlan wants to be put in touch with human hunters
Why is this show sooooo verrrrryyyy sloooooooooooooow?
Whyyyyyyyy? It’s not even a case of so many storylines – it’s every storyline
just dragging. Like Ephraim dishing out the cure – that meant all episode last
week on a train ride. And this week he’s having sex with Leigh. Everything is
just so slow to move – was there even a need for the whole bar scene?
What are Angel and Gus and Aanya? What is this storyline?
Where is it going? Why are we focused on a wrestler at all?! Yes I know where
it’s going – they’re going to meet up with Quinlan – but we’re taking so long
to get there!
And we keep having these scenes with Palmer which
basically just could say “OMINOUS AND EVIL! WOOO!” without anything new
happening – with occasionally drop ins from Coco Marchaund and WHY IS SHE EVEN
HERE?
I also call utter shenanigans that Nora would take Zach out
to get clothes so late in the day that it was pitch black, middle of the night
when she was returning. Why would she does this?
I’m not even going to pretend to be surprised by
Fitzwilliam’s pointless death – and it was, completely pointless. It didn’t
advance the story or set the tone or theme. We weren’t invested enough in him
to care about his death. It didn’t introduce a new concept – being forced to
kill people who are infected has already been tragically explored. There was no
reason why they couldn’t have driven off Kelly without him being bitten. There
was no reason for the whole church scene at all, since Nora roaming around New
York at night was ridiculous. Why even spend a couple of episodes recruiting
Fitzwilliam if this is how he is going to be used?
And was there a need to try and build Leigh up as a love interest? Oh yes, so she can be fridged – we may only know her for 2 seconds, but why have a woman die if you can’t also make a man feel terribad sad about it? All in service to the mighty Manpain!
