The next day, Phil is throwing paint into a wood chipper because there is no one to call him on his childish behaviour. Gail knocks on the door and asks Phil to have a little fun, given that his marriage with Carol was only three weeks old when it came to an end. In typical Phil, fashion he is ridiculously awkward and Gail has to spell out the details to him. Carol arrives with a container to pick up her things and Gail promises to come back later so they can finish this.
Todd serves Melissa breakfast and it's a pancake in the shape of a heart. Todd chooses this moment to confess his happiness and love, saying that it's all because of Melissa. When Todd tells Melissa that he loves her, Melissa's response is "thank you". No one wants to hear that as a response to a declaration of love.
Phil has gone to get some milk and runs into Erica. Phil is quick to say that single life is in everyone's best interest. Erica asks Phil to go on a hike with her and Phil is quick to say yes. They agree to meet at 5, two hours later than his meeting with Gail.
Later, Phil is driving his truck when he comes across a sad Todd, walking by himself. Todd tells Phil all about what happened with Melissa, and the declaration of love, Phil points out that Melissa hates him and they are the only two guys around. Todd however is worried that someone else will show up and kill their monopoly on women but Phil assures Todd that he has even more to loose given his prospects are two women. Phil declares that no one else will show up before driving off.
Despite all of the confidence he shared with Todd, Phil is just as insecure. He pulls up at a billboard sign which he painted alive at Tuscon on and decides to paint over it, saying to himself that he has a good thing going and doesn't want to see it ruined. On the sign, Phil paints moved to Tampa. Being the fool that he is, Phil doesn't pay attention and the ladder he used to access the billboard falls to the ground leaving him trapped. Phil screams for help but he is too far away for anyone to hear him.
In the meantime, Gail has shown up for her sex date with Phil, only to find his house empty. Finally, Gail settles in on Phil's bed with a glass of wine.
In the meantime, Phil has taken off his pants in an attempt to use it as shade only for the wind to blow it away. On his head, he is wearing his t-shirt. How taking off all of his clothing to protect himself from the sun made sense, is absolutely beyond me.
Erica has now shown up at Phil's for her date. Both women realise that they have both been stood up. Carol arrives and Erica explains that she had plans to go hiking with Phil. Carol being Carol, has to slut shame both women. Gail refuses to be shamed and says that she planned on having sex with Phil. Carol tells both women that they were going to get her sloppy seconds.
The next morning, Todd serves Melissa a pancake and this time, it is not in the shape of a heart. Melissa apologises for her response to Todd's declaration of love, explaining that she doesn't take saying that word lightly. Melissa then cuts the pancake into the shape of a heart and offers Todd a piece of the pancake, which he refuses.
Phil awakes and he still trapped on the billboard and is starting to go red from the sun.
Carol grabs herself come coffee and runs into Gail and Erica. When Carol learns that Phil didn't show up and missed out on the chance to have sex with two women, Carol jumps to the conclusion that Phil is dead.
Phil finds himself covered in a blanket in the back of a pick up truck.
Later that night, Carol tells the group that Phil has been missing for about twenty-four hours and suggests looking for him. Melissa, not being a fan of Phil's, says that Phil is probably fine. Erica and Gail talk about organizing a search party. They don't get far into their plans because a man driving a truck arrives with Phil in his arms.
The new arrival's name is also Phil Miller and he explains finding Old Phil. The group is shocked that both men are named Phil Miller. The new Phil says that he is from North Carolina and is former military. New Phil adds that he was a contractor for Habitat for Humanity. When Melissa explains that she was also with Habitat for Humanity, Todd is quick to wrap his around Melissa and declares himself her boyfriend. New Phil questions when the group is moving to Tampa and Melissa explains that Old Phil did this to stop anyone else from ruining Old Phil's chances at sowing his oats. The group is once again disappointed in old Phil. They all decide to leave old Phil by the fire to show New Phil around.
Todd and Melissa return home and Todd heads straight for the booze to deal with his insecurity. Todd calls the new Phil a 10 in the looks department and talks about how Melissa and new Phil have habitat in common and would make a beautiful baby. Melissa tries to assure Todd that she likes him but Todd says that he is scared that he is going to screw it up. Melissa advises Todd to be his normal, sweet, charming self.
Old Phil shows up at Gail's to apologise for missing their date and he is incredibly sun burned. Old Phil brings up their plan to have sex and Gail blows him off, saying that she is going to bed. Old Phil then asks for Erica, and is told that Erica is going to turn in as well. Gail closes the door and when Old Phil looks in the window, he sees both Erica and Gail entertaining New Phil.
The next day Old Phil decides to call a meeting. Old Phil tells the group that they can all come to him if they need anything. New Phil asks about electricity and explains that they have a perfect spot for wind and solar. When New Phil volunteers to look into, Todd pipes up to suggest that Melissa and New Phil get a room. An awkward silence ensues, so Todd excuses himself, leaving Melissa to apologise. Carol suggests that having two Phil Millers is confusing. It's Gail who suggests going by middle names and when Old Phil reveals that his middle name is Tandy, laughter ensues. New Phil doesn't have a middle name, so Gail suggests that Old Phil go by Tandy and New Phil go by Phil. Of course, Old Phil is resistant to this and suggests a competition to decide who gets to use the name Phil.
The two Phil's play Jenga for the name. Old Phil starts to trash talk and predictably this is when the Jenga tower falls over. New Phil shakes old Phil's hand calling him Tandy.
Old Phil has gone to see Carol. Carol is all dressed up and looking beautiful. Carol grabs a pie that she plans to deliver to New Phil for fixing her door. New Phil it seems is worthy of apple pie and homemade creme fraiche. Carol however does offer Old Phil the raisin balls in the fridge before opening the door to leave. Old Phil asks Carol if she likes New Phil and she accuses him of being jealous. Alone, Old Phil screams, "what is happening here?"
Well, considering that this started off as a dystopian with one man, the characters are adding up fast. Three of the seven cast members are of colour. So far, race hasn't really been issue but at least in terms of representation, The Last Man on Earth has provided more than I expected when I watched the first episode. That said, the thing is still at hot mess.
I don't like that Carol felt the need to slut shame both Gail and Erica again. I suppose it's fair that she could be jealous but that doesn't justify slut shaming. Thanks but no. The worst part about it is that it's being played for humour.
So Todd makes his big declaration and Melissa shuts him down. Seeing that they have know each other that long, Melissa's response is actually pretty reasonable. I don't like Todd treating Melissa as some sort of trophy followed by a possession he has to protect when new Phil shows up. I know they are trying to play on the whole beauty and the beast thing but that only works if we accept the premise that fat people are unattractive and therefore unlovable.
Phil being Phil. I am beyond tired of his manchild antics and constant attempts to manipulate things to his advantage. Enough already.
