Let me get a big drink, this trainwreck is about to get
much wrecker
Carol is super excited to see another person in the
world. And Phil is super excited and enthralled to see a conventionally
attractive woman in the world. I am super excited that this show is only 30
minutes long and my pain will be brief.
The woman is Melissa and she’s come to Tucson because of
Phil’s signs (Phil is staring at her in a maximum creepy way). Carol is happy
to tell Melissa all about their marriage while Phil see more willing to let the
subject drop. Though I can understand that when the unnecessary sex talk comes
up
To Phil’s house and Melissa is impressed with his art –
and agrees with him that it’s hardly stealing if there’s no-one left.
Lots more creepy leering from Phil, obliviousness from
Carol – and Phil actually shaves and puts on clothes. Though both women prefer
the beard.
They all have dinner together (Carol’s awful awful food)
with more creepiness, more fawning and even more creepiness from Phil
constantly trying to force some kind of commonality. C’mon Melissa, nows the
time to move as far away from these people as possible. An extra side message
is how awful cheating is. Just in case we missed it
When Melissa escapes, Phil is not eager to go to bed with Carol.
We then have diarrhoea and sex dreams. I am not drunk
enough for this. I don’t think it’s actually possible to be drunk enough for
this. Not even with tequila
Phil continues to fawn and creep – taking up exercise and
getting Melissa a car while arguing with Carol about their broken door (or
possibly ruin of a marriage)
Melissa an Carol come close to having a normal moment – Carol
still trying to see the good in Phil and his tolerating her eccentricities
while Melissa came very very close to actual pathos with the way she’s managed
through the year
Melissa invites them both for drinks – telling Phil and
expecting him to pass it on. Of course he doesn’t and he goes alone. After a
few drinks she tells him how terribly, overwhelmingly horny she is and how sad
it is that Phil is married
Melissa, you have an entire country worth of sex toys to
choose too and enough batteries to last until the sun explodes. This is a
better choice than Phil
Phil hurries to talk to Carol though she’s being all
fluffy with a big heart picture of them both and breaking I off with her would
be like kicking a puppy. So more diarrhoea jokes
I can accept a lot of awful from this show because it was
clearly never going to be anything but awful. I didn’t expect world building or
depth or emotional development. But I expect to try to be funny – because that
was the last claim it had left, that it was funny. Forget everything else, the humour
makes up for it
And I didn’t expect to laugh because, equally, it was
clearly not going to be my humour
But this episode took it to a new level. Not only did I
not laugh, but I didn’t especially know where I was supposed to laugh. Not only
did I not find it funny, but I can’t even find the failed attempt at humour.
Except the diarrhoea sex dream
So I’m left with the unfunny adventures of Manchild,
Sexobject and Cockblock. Yay.
Again, I question whether
we should continue following this because it’s so… alien to what we do
even with the supposed dystopian setting
At least it’s short….
Wait next week is an hour long? Oh Loki, why do you torment
me so?
I’m going to need more booze
