Yes, let Elena go!
Wait, we’re not talking about Elena?
Well, I’m much less enthused.
The one we’re letting go (beyond being a desperate Frozen
link) is, of course, dead Sheriff Liz who takes a prize for being one of the
few characters on this show I don’t want to see brutally mauled by armadillos.
So we have moving childhood flashbacks from Caroline. Damon struggles over the
eulogy and Caroline, in one of her better moments, tells him she doesn’t
actually want to have a big bonding session with him on the day of her mother’s
funeral (while Vampire Diaries often
forgets, Damon and Caroline are not friends).
Caroline deals with her grief in classic Caroline style –
plans and projects and she recruits everyone so she can have the funeral all
done and dusted in record time. She also plans on spending time with Elena,
presumably because that suffering will completely eclipse losing her mother.
Damon has flashbacks to his own mother’s funeral to add
an extra edge to the pathos which also throws in some daddy issues and
kid!Stefan. In the present, Adult Stefan has a truly awful sense of timing and
decides to ask Damon’s advice (seriously? Damon? Really?) about where his thing
with Caroline is going. On the day of Caroline’s mother’s funeral, Stefan is
concerned about he and Caroline having a relationship. He has clearly been
spending too much time around Elena. Damon’s advice is predictably awful – if
he doesn’t feel the same way about Caroline as he did about his past loves
(Elena or Elena clones) then it’s not true love (because you can only feel love
one way and love for Elena is the truest and purest of loves, it is known).
Elena gives advice on how to deal with people’s
sympathies (including a woman who decided the best way to express condolences
was to get in a dig about Caroline’s dead gay father) since she has a lot of
experience with that and Caroline decides she really needs to know about
kissing Stefan and what it means. Because the writers of Vampire Diaries can’t even leave out the romance on the day of
Liz’s funeral.
Damon tries to stay on topic, stressing about giving
Liz’s eulogy when he’s not a nice person. He’s comforted by Elena and inspired
by more flashbacks.
To the open casket pre-funeral and Stefan asks Caroline
if she’s ok (which is such a terrible thing to ask to chief mourner at a
funeral). She decides to talk relationship (at least acknowledging how horribly
inappropriate this is). Stefan begs off because terrible terrible timing and
dumping Caroline in front of the open casket of her dead mother would quite
possibly be the utterly worst thing that anyone on this show has ever done. And
yes, this is The Vampire Diaries.
Speaking of unacceptable, Matt stops Tyler going to the
funeral because he’s drink. Yes, he’s so sad about dumping Liv because she did
something silly while grieving (and isn’t Elena) that he’s been drunk for
several days and couldn’t sober up for Liz’s funeral.
The funeral happens complete with police and Damon’s
eulogy full of praise for Caroline and what Liz wanted to say to her and
Caroline singing. Afterwards they have a wake and Tyler has managed to sober up
in tie for Matt to tell him about his plan to become a cop and he wants Tyler
to join him.
Afterwards Damon and Stefan have a moment and Stefan
decides to discount Damon’s advice and realises that all love doesn’t feel the
same and just because he doesn’t feel for Caroline what he felt for Elena and
her clones doesn’t mean it can’t build into something more.
Caroline has gone home for some alone time, but Elena has
followed her (alone time is not something Elena understands). Elena is worried
that Caroline plans to turn off her humanity. Elena who has been down that road
before, says how terrible an idea that is but Caroline hits back that she has
always had way more control over her vampireness than Elena has (very true).
Caroline also hits back at how Elena is the absolute freaking master of being
unable to confront her own grief – turning off her humanity, removing her
memories of Damon – so who is she to lecture Caroline about escaping grief? She
adds that when Elena came back to herself, the worst of her grief was over –
selfish it my have been, but it helped her.
They hug it out, Elena says how she won’t let Caroline do
this – and Caroline breaks her neck and says “that’s not your choice to make.”
Meanwhile Alaric cooked for Jo and now she is terribly
terribly sick. Oh Jo, how well I know the terrible peril of having a loved one
cook for you when they should be banned by law from ever approaching a kitchen.
Evil Kai decides to join them – and he’s ill as well. Apparently Rick’s cooking
is vindicated and Kai and Jo may actually be sick because “we’re siblings
that’s close enough” is not actually a twin merge. Of course, if Kai dies, so
does the whole family/coven
I am waiting for someone to tell me why this is a bad thing
After doing a full medical check up Jo declares he’s medically fine. Kai then coughs up blood. Jo is a really awful doctor. However what does make him feel better is sucking down a bit of Jo’s magic. Kai decides Jo’s magic is the cure and demands she hands it over. Alaric isn’t a fan of this plan but Kai reminds him that Jo et al will die if he does (Alaric also threatens Kai as if he’s still a vampire). And added incentive – if he dies all the prison worlds the Gemini Coven control will also collapse
Note the plural there. Yes there are several worlds.
Jo decides to ask Alaric for advice as the agonise over
the decision of a) dying and unleashing lots of imprisoned badness to briefly
keep the magic Jo wasn’t using anyway or b) not dying and unleashing hell on
earth. Alaric wisely does the “hell no, you make this decision” but words it
romantically.
Jo makes the obvious decision and gives Kai her magic. Afterwards Kai is fine (alas) and whispers some stunning secret into her ear before leaving, telling her to have a good life. The big secret is that Jo was sick not because of food poisoning or Kai being ill – but because she’s pregnant. Is magical pregnancy senses a thing in the Gemini Coven as well?
Alaric proposes and Jo hits back with a no because it’s a blatant pity proposal. He redeems this awful proposal by pulling out a ring and proving that he has actually planned this and it wasn’t a spur of the moment thing prompted by sudden babies. It’s a nice rock as well, so kudos there. She says yes.
Over to the spirit world and Bonnie has gone through all
kinds of adventures which I would probably have much rather have watched to
finally get her magic back from a bloodstained gravestone magic rocky thingy
(I’d link to the many episodes that explain it but let’s just take it as a
given that a bloodstained uber magic rock is out there – because many seasons
of twisty canon went into it). She plans to go home once the eclipse hits (and
once she’s finished all the booze).
Unfortunately the eclipse that happens every night skips
that night, probably because of the whole prison-worlds-are-falling-apart thing
because the Gemini Coven have turned “I’m taking you down with me!” into an art
form.
She’s now in a snowy wilderness complete with northern
lights and spooky looking house. She finds a book in the house where someone
has written about nightly northern lights (just as her prison had nightly
eclipses) and it being the 1st November 1903. She’s fallen into
someone else’s prison dimension.
I’m confident Bonnie will survive with whoever is there – she’s survived Elena.
She also finds pictures of Stefan and Damon.
As the worlds oscillate back and forth as Kai gets Jo’s
magic, Bonnie decides that eclipse/northern lights are all much of a muchness
and she casts the spell to escape anyway; but as she does a woman appears in
period dress. Presumably this dimension’s prisoner.
Damon goes back to his house to fine – BONNIE! They hug and it is awesome. After hugging she
shows him the prisoner she saw – it’s Damon’s mother. Yup, kind of predictable
to be honest; all that foreshadowing flashback and parental issues was
definitely looming.
Stefan finds Elena’s body – I do not care, Bonnie is
back!
BONNIE IS FINALLY FREE! And probably bringing the new big
bad/angst source. Took them long enough!
Liz’s big send off – I think it was generally decent. We
had a few too many romance moments but Elena managed not to make it all about
her which was pretty good. I think Liz got the send off her character deserved.
I have to give major support to Caroline calling out
Elena on her grief dodging and her hypocrisy. No-one has ever really called
Elena on her repeated refusal to confront her emotions and to have her lecture
Caroline really did need arguing down. And even more points for pointing out
that she HAS always had way better control than Elena has. And even more bonus
points for Caroline breaking Elena’s neck along with that perfect line: “that’s
not your choice to make.”
Now, I don’t agree with Caroline turning off her
humanity, of course, because every vampires that does that unleashes
atrocities. But Elena was an incredible hypocrite here and Caroline’s counters
were dead on target.
The Gemini Coven seems to really love their load-bearing
boss trope. Their whole coven dies if the leader dies but so does everyone in
their prison worlds? Or are they released? As a bonus they try to make their
coven leader extra traumatised by making them murder their twin just to ensure
that the big load bearing leader is a little vulnerable as well.
I had a full rant planned about Damon’s terrible advice
but then Stefan rightly realised how bad it was. As an aside, my advice to
Stefan would be “maybe you and she are or will be in love. But now is not the
time – you’re immortal, you can afford to be patient and supportive and wait to
explore any mutual feelings you may have until after she has had chance to
grieve for her mother and heal, until you are sure any decisions she makes
won’t be powered by grief, loneliness and loss” Then I’d slap him for even
worrying about it on the day of Liz’s funeral.
Jo gave Kai her magic – y’know Luke’s death has been
terrible from start to finish but raising the possibility that voluntary
donation may have been equally acceptable? This show keeps rubbing salt into
this wound
I also think they need to stop dragging up the Gemini
storyline. It’s like a letter with 8 or 9 P.S. at the bottom. It’s done. You
don’t get 8 or 9 epilogues. For that matter, Matt & Tyler the cops and Jo
& Alaric the parents? Let’s not. Please.
