Stefan’s doppleganger – who you remember they’re going to
murder for the Travellers for REASONS, is an EMT in at Atlanta called Tom –that’s
what Stefan tells the Travellers. She passes the info onto Enzo and Caroline
who are their happy death squad and Caroline is not amused at her continuing to
fry Stefan’s brain and threatens vengeance in return.
Elena’s having morning after angst about sleeping with
Damon and has to attend Jeremy’s parent teacher conference – won’t that be…
kind of weird and awkward given the complete lack of age difference and the
fact these teachers taught Elena a couple of years ago? Well if Elena or Jeremy
actually ever went to school, that is. She tells Damon it was all a mistake
while her eyes keep wandering below the waist.
Damon goes to the bar and unloads on Matt and Tyler (are
they his friends now?) with lots of snark – and Jeremy and Liv have a drink
together in the background. And Elena, at parent teacher night, calls and
unloads on Bonnie and they both realise Jeremy was at parts unknown the night
before (Jeremy spending more time with Liv?). Luke enters the room where Bonnie
is so we have another reference to him being gay.
Parent teacher night gets more awkward because Damon is
logged as Jeremy’s primary contact, not Elena. Damon snarks about Jeremy being
with Liv (with a truly excellent reference to Jeremy’s love life to date – “all
it needs is a sappy love song and a pottery wheel” that’s worth a Fang all on
it’s own). Damon takes the snark and runs with it when the teacher reports on
Jeremy’s less than stellar behaviour (this is meant to convince us he has
actually been to school). The counsellor gets all judgy about Elena not being
stable and Damon is nicely snarky about it.
Meanwhile the murder buddies are looking for Tom and Enzo
is flirting with Caroline. And they find that Tom has disappeared for the last
4 months. So since the link is old it’s time for some more brain fried Stefan
(much to Caroline’s distress) and they find the memory of a woman Tom met
called Hazel – and her address. These visions manage to be both damn convenient
and long winded – they could show completely useless information OR they could
show where he ACTUALLY is but instead we get convenient bread crumbs.
They find the address, open the door and see that Hazel
is a witch and she’s mid ritual. They can’t get in because she owns the house
and is in a trance so can’t invite them in – so Enzo kills her by throwing a doorknob
at her head (see, this is how you deal with the Travellers). Caroline is
shocked and appalled, Enzo “I’m a murderous vampire. Surprise.” Heh, I like
him.
At college Bonnie wonders why Luke keeps looking at her
right when dead Hazel appears with a message for the anchor to pass on to Luke –
she failed to hide the doppleganger with magic and “they” found us.
Speaking of Traveller plotting, Liv talks to Jeremy (using magic to block Tyler’s super hearing) because she can trust him because Hunters are immune to Traveller mind control. We get a brief exposition – Travellers are not quite witches, apparently, and they have a huge grudge against witches who draw their magic from nature (something about a curse). They’re up to something and they’re heading to Mystic Falls because of Elena (yes the world does revolve around her – oooh thank you lampshade!) Then she gets a message from Luke about Hazel being dead and plan has to change – she leaves. Tyler tries to stop her, she throws him across the room – pretending to be a newbie witch is over.
Caroline and Enzo continue to argue over random murder
and he tries to be nice about the whole killing thing when they hear a
heartbeat. They find Tom in the basement, drugged or magicked asleep and on a
drip. Caroline puts together the 4 month time period – Tom was kidnapped at the
same time that Silas, the original doppleganger, was killed. Enzo tries to get
Caroline let him do the killing since it will bother her more but she insists
because she made the deal – though she has another plan. She compels Tom’s calm
obedience then breaks Enzo’s neck; she’s rescuing Tom.
Caroline bonds with rescued Tom, finding him super nice
which is going to make killing him so much harder. Instead she compels him to
get on a train to happier pastures without murder. Except Enzo arrives and
snaps Tom’s neck – see he’s made a deal with the Travellers to find his old
wannabe girlfriend Maggie.
Bonnie questions Luke about Hazel and Liv when she gets a
call from Jeremy who has decided, for reasons unknown, that Liv is a threat to
Elena; Luke makes a hasty exit.
Damon and Elena, meanwhile, are playing with lots of
sexual tension until Elena wanders off on her own by way of convenient and
convoluted plot point because then Liv can ambush her with magic and stake. She
apologises – her coven really did try to protect Elena, but now it’s too dangerous
so she has to die. Damon to the rescue (and mocking her amateurish guilt
delaying the killing).
Damon ties up Liv for some questioning, which involves
torture which turns into Elena and Damon arguing about why they broke up which
is even more painful than the finger breaking. Faced with more relationship
angst, Liv breaks and tells them that the Travellers will take Elena to use
since she’s the last female doppleganger – and soon Stefan will be the last
male one. And the witches don’t want that. Elena and Damon start bickering again.
And Jeremy arrives because he will defend Liv with his life (despite calling
her a threat earlier, though he has no way of knowing that and actually turned
out to be right. Because REASONS!) They bicker some more and Elena brings up
Jeremy’s school record BECAUSE THAT IS TOTALLY RELEVENT while outside Tyler and
Matt arrive to stop Luke with some judicious throttling. Elena decides to take
Jeremy’s assurance that Liv will protect her despite the recent attempted murdering
and Jeremy knowing nothing about Liv so having zero knowledge of her, her
motives or anything else because this I the Vampire Diaries and it doesn’t have
to make sense.
And Damon has to go along with it because not doing so
means he doesn’t trust Elena to trust Jeremy to trust a complete and utter
stranger who has been lying to them for an indefinite period of time and who
just tried to murder her BECAUSE FREAKING REASONS THAT’S WHY!
Is this why everyone in Mystic Falls drinks hard liquor?
Or is the constant drinking of hard liquor that causes these decisions?
Anyway Liv is rescued and she goes and bickers with Luke.
She convinces Luke they can protect Elena because Jeremy, as a hunter, will
notice any threat before it happens. Why? I have no clue – I’m going to put
this down to Liv’s epic ignorance of what a Hunter is or does because we have
seen zero indication that Jeremy is especially alert. I think the posse of vampires
willing to serve Elena’s every need is slightly more reassuring.
Now some more Elena and Damon angst. And Jeremy moves out
to crazy with Matt and Tyler because Elena and Damon’s live is constantly crazy
and gives him zero stability. Part of the reason he’s doing badly at school is
he is dealing with things every day that make any school issues irrelevant in
comparison.
Caroline returns to Stefan for some more
these-two-are-definitely-becoming-a-couple moment
More Damon and Elena angst about how they are so bad for each other but can’t resist each other –so Elena is going back to campus to stay well away from him.
And no-one’s actually bothered to tell Bonnie anything so
she still thinks Jeremy is ignoring her and off possibly with someone else.
That night the Tavellers cast one of their chanty spells
and start drinking Stefan and Elena’s mixed blood (I like how Stefan and
Caroline are totally shocked that the Travellers have a nefarious purpose for
the blood… really?) As the spell progresses they set themselves on fire – still
chanting. As they die they each appear before Bonnie, the Anchor, still
chanting even in death as they pass through her. She collapses – and a man
appears from her shadow and leaves the building
As a point of curiosity – where does Elena’s income come
from? She doesn’t work, I didn’t get the impression Aunt Jenna was sitting on a
stash of millions – was she surprisingly well insured? (And How much ARE life
insurance premiums in Mystic Falls?) Are the Salvatores funding her?
Also out of curiosity – since they have the cure and the
Travellers have repeatedly shown themselves to be suspicious and dangerous… why
are they playing the honour system? Why even pretend to find Tom? Why not team
up with Tyler, Elena and Damon and kill the Travellers one by one? Before
anyone invokes morality, I wish to remind you that the alternative is murdering
an innocent paramedic. Medical professional vs morally dubious powerful people
up to some nefarious scheme. I know where I’d lie.
I may have missed it as well – but when did Enzo get a
daylight ring? Did the Travellers get him one?
Elena and Damon’s relationship bickering may set a whole
new record for self-absorbed lack of priorities on this show. And this is the Vampire
Diaries – this show wrote the book on self-absorbed lack of priorities.
I think the motto for why anyone does anything on Vampire
Diaries may just have to be BECAUSE REASONS! In the same way Helix is BECAUSE
SCIENCE!
I actually like Jeremy’s school issues because it makes a
point about him trying to juggle a normal life with the eternal drama,
something most of the other characters aren’t doing. Especially since as a
minor (HA!) he has all kinds of rules and regs he has to follow which Elena et
al can duck out of. Except it would have been nice to make this an ongoing
theme especially since a) Jeremy hasn’t been overly involved this season and b)
no-one is actually involved in this normal life stuff anyway.
