This episode begins with a flashback to 1970 and Kirby, the ghost we saw at the end of the last episode crosses the street to retrieve a ball and is struck by a car, killing him instantly.
In present day, Hal is holding the baby who is crying and he calls out for help. Tom tells him that Annie has made a schedule for every hour for the baby. Hal says that they must destroy the schedule. Annie walks in saying that someone is watching them. Kirby rings the door and Hal and Tom search him roughly and Kirby claims that Nina sent him. Kirby says that he was a nursery teacher before he died and that Nina didn't come because werewolves can't be ghosts.
Annie invites Kirby in saying that she is not going to pretend that she doesn't need the help. Annie marches into Tom's room without knocking and then complains that his room is messy. I don't think I could live with Annie, as she seems to have no sense of boundaries. When Annie shows him Eve's room, Kirby makes a face when he sees all of the crucifixes hanging over the crib. Kirby suggests that they paint the room a bright colour and add some toys.
Annie marches downstairs and orders Tom to get some nice things for the nursery. When Eve starts to cry, Annie leaves and Kirby is quick to mention to Tom that Annie has him all trained and that Annie says jump and Tom asks how high. Clearly this ghost is a shit distruber.
Hal is doing his push ups shirtless (a beautiful sight I might add) when Annie says that it is time for him to do the baby massage and stimulating story time. Really? He says that he cannot because on his schedule it says noon push ups and then a program on radio 4. For Hal this is important because this is how he focuses, but Annie says that they are meant to be a team. She hands him the baby telling him not to forget to use lavender oil and leaves the room.
Upstairs, Annie finds Kirby in Tom's room cleaning up. When she tells him that he doesn't have to do that, he responds, 'Tom says that you can get a bit twisted if things don't go your way." When Annie asks him to repeat it, he says to forget that he said that. Yep, Kirby is a shit disturber. Of course, Kirby wants Annie to know that he doesn't mean to cause any trouble between them and Annie assures him that he can't because thanks to her schedule, they're "a well oiled machine." Kirby takes the opportunity to ask about Hal because Eve is the war child, but Annie says that she trusts him.
Downstairs, Tom is dragging a container that he found on a skid and when Annie gets upset, he says that it will be easy to fix up. As Tom drags it outside, Kirby tells Annie that Tom is young and that perhaps it will be good to have another man around the house. Upstairs, Kirby knocks on Tom's door to tell him that he thought the container just needed a good clean and Tom responds "but Annie said" and again Kirby cuts him off. Kirby then notices that all of the pictures on Tom's wall are of families and he centers in on the one with the birthday cake, causing Tom to admit that he has never so much as had a birthday card. It turns out that the next day is Tom's 21st birthday and Kirby says that it's a massive day and points out that of course Hal and Annie know. Kirby says that Hal and Annie are organizing him a surprise birthday party and that he cannot say anything, or else he will ruin the surprise.
Hal pops in saying that Annie is getting hysterical downstairs and that he is not enjoying it. Downstairs Annie is walking the baby and yells, "she has a temperature, a bloody temperature." Kirby calmly says to call a GP and get him to do a home visit. He suggests that they say that Tom is the father, and when Hal asks where's the mother, Kirby responds at work. Tom sets up a fantasy in which his pretend wife is a barrister and they are a power couple.
The doctor shows up and Tom let's him in, reciting exactly what Annie told him to say. When things start to go wrong, Annie screams for Hal, who tells the doctor that he is Tom's boyfriend reluctantly. Hal asks what the doctor meant by saying that Tom was weird and the doctor says that Tom is a half wit. Hal responds saying, "no you weren't. You were saying that he is gay and being prejudiced." The doctor starts to deny this and Hal tells him to just check on the baby. It turns out Eve has a simple ear infection. Tom walks over and puts his arm around Hal and the doctor says, "I had not idea you were gay. Most gay couples have taste (referring to the decor) and there was no mention of an adoption. I couldn't find anything about her on our entire system." Hal tells him to go away, and the doctor says "fine, there are things I need to check." Annie starts to worry because he cannot check on Eve's background. As he walks out Tom says, "Oh great mistrust queens, well that's how we're used to it mate, I'm gay and I'm straight. That's not how it is, I'm queer and I'm here."
Before continuing on with the recap, I have to pause to talk about this exchange. In four seasons, there has only been one gay character and he killed his lover. Having Tom and Hal pretend to be lovers so they could charge discrimination to avoid the doctor's questions is deeply offensive. If Being Human wants to erase GLBT characters then erase them, don't use their marginalization as a tool; it's simply offensive.
The doctor goes out to his car and Kirby pops in. Kirby places his hand on his chest and tells him that his heart is starting to race. Then he tells the doctor that his heart starts to flutter. As Kirby is causing a disruption with the doctor's heartbeat, he confesses how much loves this and misses this. He says, "in the old days I would have used a knife but this is so much better." The doctor then dies, but we don't see his ghost appear and I find this weird because thus far, every time someone has died, we have seen their ghost.
In the house, Hal watches as the GP is loaded into an ambulance, as Kirby hide around a corner. Hal asks Kirby if he knows what happened to the GP and Kirby responds, "Heart attack I suspect. As soon as he came in I thought, now there's someone who shouldn't start any long books." Hal is not sold and says it's peculiar that this happened on the day Kirby arrived. Kirby tells him that he is the expert on death and then starts to bring up the people that Hal killed. He suggests that Annie wouldn't recognize Hal from his past, but Hall says Annie knows what he was like, to which Kirby asks, "all the gory details?" Kirby points out that Hall might be used to what he has done but someone hearing all the details for the first time might find it quite disturbing. At this point, I really want Hal to find a way to just eat Kirby. It seems that Kirby's goal is to get Annie to like him and help with the baby and he expects Hal to help him achieve that goal. He claims to just want to be part of the family and suggests that if he is going to keep quiet about the details of Hal's past, then he deserves the same courtesy.
Tom is out back scrubbing down the container when Kirby approaches him. Tom says, "you're right, they do talk down to me don't they." Kirby answers, "a bit." Kirby suggests that they are just being like this because this is the last day then can. "Tomorrow, you're going to be 21, a man, an equal." Tom asks again if he really believes that they are throwing him a massive party and Kirby responds, "well, you would have to have a heart of stone not to." Kirby then goes on to tell him how his parents transformed the house into the starship Enterprise. Uh huh, when is someone going to eat him?
Upstairs, Annie is with the baby when Hal walks in. He starts to tell her about his past, saying that he would prefer her to hear it from him, but Annie cuts him off saying that they are just starting to work as a family. Annie doesn't want to hear and it scares her to think of what he has done and what he could do. Annie claims to "want something good for a change, something uncomplicated. " This causes Hal to ask if this is what she believes Kirby is, and Annie answers, "Yes, I suppose so compared to...." She doesn't finish her sentence, and Hal turns slowly and leaves the room.
Kirby is waiting for Hal at the bottom of the stairs and Hal says, "she's like it that you're soft." Kirby says that this is his way in and that it will be good for all of them, especially the baby.
Tom wakes up the next morning and comes running down the stairs to find Kirby, Annie and Hal sitting around the table. Tom says hello loudly and Annie hushes him not wanting to wake the baby. Kirby takes Tom into the other room to say happy birthday and says that everyone is going to pretend that they don't know it's his birthday, and that at 5pm, he is to come back grouching that everyone forgot his birthday and then they will jump out and surprise him. I think that this is absolutely cruel to set Tom up in this way. Kirby tells him to eat and leave and when Tom asks him about the schedule he says, "do you want to ruin your own 21st?"
Hal is reading the paper and tells them that Jason Healey (the man charged with the box tunnel murders) stomach held human flesh. Annie does not understand because they know he didn't do it. Tom says he doesn't care and is loud about demanding breakfast. The minute he leaves the room, Kirby points out that Tom's problem is that he holds onto too much anger. Of course, Annie agrees with him. Hal finishes his tea and leaves to find out what is going on with Healey.
Hal confronts Dr. Wilson in the court hallways to ask why she lied about her findings. She denies that her findings were false and so he pushes her against the wall and starts to point out that she is stressed by the smell of cigarettes on her and the fact that her nails are bitten to the quick. Dr. Wilson tries to escape but Hal chases her down and threatens to kill her if she does not reveal who made her write the report. She begs saying that he will kill her, but Hal counters by reminding her that he will kill her if she doesn't. He asks if he is like him by showing her his vampire face, and Dr. Wilson pushes him away crying saying that he likes to make people so afraid they can't function. Hal pulls back saying that he is sorry and leaves.
Annie comes downstairs looking for Hal but Kirby points out that he is not back again. Annie is disappointed because it's Hal turn on the schedule to look after Eve. When she asks about Tom, she learns that he has left. Kirby offers to help but she says no, but then goes on about how tired she is. Well, I understand looking after a baby is work, but Annie has gone so far to the extreme she has actually managed to make it more work than it has to be. Kirby says that if it makes her feel better that he is there for her.
Later in the evening, Hal comes back and Annie wants to know where he has been. When he reminds her that he said he was looking into the box tunnel case, Annie says that she was surprised it took so long. Hal says he believes that it has something to do with vampires spreading stories and that they need to be careful. Kirby asks if vampires are dangerous and Hal rolls his eyes and says killers. Kirby responds, "not you though, thank goodness we have you." Hal rolls his eyes again and says that he is interrupting and leaves.
Tom practices pretending to be surprised before walking in. When Annie walks in she asks him where the hell he has been and reminds him that he was supposed to have been watching eve. Tom goes into his room and rips all the photos off the wall. Kirby walks into the room and apologizes, saying he thought that it was going to happen, because this is what usually happens in families. Tom is upset because he finally thought that he was going to have something normal. Tom starts to cry and Kirby tells him that Hal said he doesn't want him to grow up and wants to keep him in a kennel just like his dad.
Tom bursts into Hal's room with a stake. They begin to fight and Annie tries to stop it. Tom rushes out of the house and Annie confronts Hal about what happened. Kirby interrupts saying that he promises to make everything all right. Tom walks through the streets clearly drunk and continues to drink. He gets into a fight in an alley, while in the house Kirby is whistling to himself.
Hal confronts Kirby about Tom being upset, but Kirby says on the plus side, Annie is happy with me. Hal points out that Tom was his friend, to which Kirby asks why he isn't ashamed of this fact, considering that Tom is a werewolf. Kirby feels that he was helping Annie by getting rid of Tom and Hal asks how long it will be until he is next? Kirby believes that he and Annie would be a good couple and that it won't be long until Hal flips out. Kirby starts ripping apart Hal's room but when he gets to the picture of Leo, Hal begs him not to and then Kirby drops it on the floor. Hal bursts into the baby's room and Kirby is holding the baby screaming no Hal don't hurt the baby, as Annie stands in the doorway. Kirby screams that Hal is a monster and Annie tells Hal that he has to leave the house now.
Cutler goes to the police station to act as Tom's lawyer. Cutler hands the sergeant a CCTV tape showing that Tom wasn't actually fighting anyone. Tom realises that Cutler is a vampire and Cutler tells him it must have been hard growing up like this, but that there are good vampires out there.
At the house, Hal packs up the car as Annie watches. Alone, Annie starts to cry and Kirby comes in to comfort her. Annie says that she thought that things could be like they were before. Kirby asks what Nina meant by George about his GQ magazine and Annie tells the story about how she just wanted one good man and that she doesn't know what she would do without him. Hal tells her that he can't figure out if Tom left if she was boring or he thought he would self harm if she mentioned the bloody schedule again. He tells her that she drives people away and that she drove Mitchell to suicide. Hal confesses that he wasn't a nursery teacher and he reveals how he broke up families and then murdered them. Annie begins to cry and she becomes less visible and finally disappears. Kirby stands and says, "that ladies and gentleman is what we call mission accomplished."
Hal is in the car at a red light when Tom knocks on the window asking what he is doing. Tom says that he is sorry and Hal rolls down the window. Tom realizes that Kirby is behind all of the problems. On the television, the older Eve asks him what he is doing because he is dancing. She tells him to kill the baby, but Kirby says he wants to savor the moment. Tom and Hal enter the house to find Annie and Kirby hides. Tom asks him if he wants to kill the baby and Kirby says that if he kills her that he gets to stay. The baby is lying on the couch and Kirby has a knife to her. Kirby says you can leave or watch her die. Kirby reveals that he was the Toy Man in life, when the lights suddenly go off. Annie appears and uses some power to make him disappear. The lights go back on and she picks up the baby asking, "is it me or do I have the worst taste in men?"
Cutler talks to Dr. Wilson and she tells him that a vampire came after him and wanted to know about the cover up. She mentions that he tried to frighten her and then apologized. She says she wants to forget all of this and return to her children, and then Cutler kills her.
Upstairs in Tom's room, Hal is rehanging the pictures on Tom's wall when Annie screams, Tom, Hal help. When Tom runs downstairs, Annie is singing happy birthday, holding a cake. Tom starts to take the cake and Annie tells him to blow out the candle. When Tom goes to get the plates, Annie apologizes to Hal and Hal says he is sorry that she had to see that side of him. Annie says it was no worse than what she did and when she felt Tom and Hal in the house that she fought her way back. Annie says now she knows that he can never hurt Eve and then hugs him. This makes Hal very uncomfortable, so he returns to his room. When he pulls down his sleeve we see a burn on his arm. Is he the one fated to hurt Eve?
